Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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