He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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