I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Just wondering did you put mouse traps and brownies on my porch?
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
you scattered cereal all over the floor so you could "re-trace your steps and figure out what happened." 20 min later you yelled about the mess and let the dog in to clean it up. 5 min after that you screamed since the cereal was gone. you suspected me and locked me in the bathroom so i could "think about what i'd done"
and you bit everyone who tried to let me out. no more tequila for you. EVER.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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