Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i've got to stop sleeping with short guys. they always turn into stage 5 clingers
I just found puke in my bra..
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
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