why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
