1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
That was the night you tried to convince me you threw up your sould because your throwup was black
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
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