I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
