I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Randomize