it's too hot outside to masturbate.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
