Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
porn star boner night. come get it.
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He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
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I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
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