i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
You know you suck at relationships when you are sitting in the airport on Christmas day, alone, swiping on Tinder.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
