the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
Finally had sex in the new kitchen. Burnt the hamburgers and hit myself in the face with the freezer door. Worth it.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
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