What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
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