I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
Randomize
