Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
The first thing we did this morning was see if we could see her barf in the prking lot from the roof. We could. It was in 5 spaces.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
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