oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
As soon as you told us you were an ostrich with a big penis, we began to wonder what you were on and if you wanted to share.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize