He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Randomize
