My entire life is one complicated drinking game
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
Randomize