What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I gave myself a charlie horse masturbating this morning. I feel like that really set the tone for the day.
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
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