I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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