This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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