This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
