playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
He passed out mid-signature
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
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