It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
