Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Boobs are out for the taking
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
