what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize