the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Blow job season was short but glorious.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
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