Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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