I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
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