You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
