Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize