Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
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