did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Randomize
