Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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