Already got asked if we're dating
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I've decided to give up hard drugs for the rest of the year.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
