i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
