If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
