we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
True strength comes from lack of pants
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
