Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
