I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Umm ok I'm kinda freaked out right now bc the chick that lives next door is either having tantric sex or slowly suffocating her dog to death.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize