The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize