And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I just woke up in his bed.. in a cardboard castle, with a Justin Bieber poster on the ceiling staring down at me, cuddling with 4 empty PBR cans. I win.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
