Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Just remembered I told my boss that matt used to make me toss his salad like every time we hooked up. Nice
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
You did what with his pubic hair?
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