And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
