what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Randomize
