i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize
