I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
her vagine was all disorganized.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
