It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
well most of my day revolves around power hour
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
