Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
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