I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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