Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
