My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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